They’re traumatized. My voices, that is. They’re traumatized by my living, I guess. They harass each other. This time it is because I quit my meds. My voices actually want me on my meds. Things go smoother then.
I don’t hear them in pain, or when they are suffering. They go quiet. It is quiet tonight, so maybe something is wrong, I think? What a weird world my head has become. Spirits fighting spirits. I’ve actually gotten used to them.
I have a steady, “home group” of voices, then they switch out throughout the day. They come to visit me, and nighttime is the best time. Often the most active. My energy has been so low, though, hence me going off my meds.
I’m going off my meds for bipolar because they weren’t working. I would feel depressed all morning then manic and anxious at night. Off the meds, I feel a steady state. Figure that one out. Meds sometimes just stop working, or cause bad side effects, sometimes the very thing they are purported to treat.
When things are good, I have good voices. I’m lucky in that way, and that may be my only form of luck. I’m staying on my anti-psychotic because I have learned (now) that leads to nothing good. Ever.